>what does the word “embrace” mean? i think it means something more than acceptance or tolerance. something more like a willingness to adapt and even enjoy the changes that come our way.
over the past few days, specifically the last eight hours, i have felt like i’ve been embracing my life. and learning how to deal with it with grace, thank the Lord.
running to me brings me joy, and pain. no pain, no gain. this morning i felt a little defeated because i hadn’t run since last wednesday. i was slacking on my training schedule. i was talking to aaron this morning and asked him if he’d ever run in the rain. stupid question for a soldier. but he told me to have fun. so. i tied my shoes, put on a very not-white t-shirt, and went. i ran the prescribed 3.5 miles. i forgot my HRM so i didn’t time it. but who cares? i finished it without stopping and actually enjoyed myself. i’m guessing it was around 40 minutes.
wow. i felt like a kid, especially running down the hills i had trudged up on the opposite way. i even smiled to myself and thought about how crazy i looked to most people. again, who cares? it was so great! i feel like i’m breaking through that mental wall. actually looking forward to my sunday five-miler. i signed up for two 5k’s within the next few weeks, too. aaron said that for my “reward” for finishing my first half marathon i can get an ipod touch. he’s not a huge fan, but i really want one. i think it’s a perfect motivation!
i’ve stopped giving into emotional manipulation, guilt trips and such. it’s hard because it seems to be ingrained to either give in or participate myself. however, i am not enabling others anymore. of course, i pray about the right course of action and that i speak the truth in love (eph. 4:15).
i am also learning to forgive 7 times 70 (matthew 18). maybe God is keeping me in illinois for right now so i can settle debts.
i had some collective soul on my mp3 player and while i was running heard this lyrics from “precious declaration”: “now i’m cleansed with hopefulness”. that’s how i feel.