It's halfway through August and I've had a lot of feelings come up. I'm not returning to the classroom as I resigned at the end of the year, but my body thinks I am. It's what we call "fake fall" on the East Coast, meaning the temps have dropped a little bit but will return … Continue reading New job, who dis?
Have I ever really been ambitious or singular about one particular thing in my life? That's the question I'm walking around with this morning. Also, what has been/is my ambition? And does it align at all to my place in a capitalistic society? For years I was a teacher. While I would say I had … Continue reading What is ambition, really?
I know that when I feel anxious or swimming in thoughts, I need to just write them down. It's amazing the clarity that can be realized when I put my anxious thoughts to rest. Being alone is hard for me. Ironically, I'm an introvert. But I think in today's terms I'd be considered an "extroverted … Continue reading Being alone is difficult
When I was in junior high, we had to read Call of the Wild in English language arts class. The kicker was that we had to follow along with a cassette tape recording of the book. I remember getting in trouble for reading ahead. The funny part about it is that I actually don't remember … Continue reading If you’re smart but can’t remember what you read, read this.
For my whole life, I've equated what I do with who I am. As in, I have believed that my actions demonstrate the type of person I am. This means that for my whole life, I've been labeling myself. Applying dichotomies to my character, oftentimes false. If I said I'm not sure where I learned … Continue reading Changing the tone of self-talk
Recovery is going well. Physical recovery, that is. Yesterday I felt more human that I'd felt in a week since major surgery. I was able to go down the stairs in a normal fashion and get myself showered. All that in addition to making coffee and fixing breakfast. It's amazing how the little things make … Continue reading Undoing the world
I think I've figured it out. The reason why I'm in a very frequent state of existential angst. I feel like I'm going up a creek in many areas of my life. I'm looking for solutions, even proposing solutions, but very few seem to be picking up what I'm putting down. It could be me. … Continue reading Controlled chaos, at the very least
It's what people say when you're at an uncomfortable height. It's advice and admonishment. It's a warning against the inevitable void that will entice you to fall. It could be a bend from reality, a willful ignorance of what actually exists. At some point, we have to look down and get real. We have to … Continue reading Don’t look down
It's October 2021, and in case you didn't realize it, 2022 is just around the corner. Almost two years since the world changed. I mean, the world is always changing, but a global pandemic will do a number on "normalcy." Don't worry, though, I won't rush through the last two months of the year. Fall … Continue reading Breaking my COVID vows
Even before I was old enough to have a job in the traditional sense, working on the weekends, particularly Saturdays, was a concept I knew well. Many a Saturday morning, I woke up at a decent time (not by my own accord), perused the "to-do list" written by my mother, and with my sisters we … Continue reading The Problem of Saturday