Breaking News: “Top Nine” Doesn’t Capture Most Important Moments

I use Instagram fairly regularly, probably with more regularity now that I have opted out of Facebook. I know, I know, Instagram is owned by Facebook blah blah blah.

Everyone’s been posting their “Top Nine” recently – the most liked photos in their feeds. Once again, social media panders and quite frankly takes advantage of our desire to be liked and seen and celebrated.

I share my Top Nine, because why not? But I have to add that my top moments most were not shared on Instagram for the world to see.

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I can make quite a few assumptions about 2018 from these pictures. I traveled a lot, spent some time in the hospital, exercised a bunch, and am apparently still in love with my spouse. These are all true, but there’s so much more that happened in 2018 not pictured here, like that kid who was absent on picture day.

I will spare the weary reader nine things that happened in 2018. But I will share that one of the best memories is sitting with my sister on my parents’ porch late at night pondering the recent death of our grandmother and watching an amazing Midwestern thunderstorm. I will share that the reconciliation of a friendship was culminated in lovely time spent with her and her family. I will share that the financial and childless freedom to travel to new places has really helped me settle into my unforeseen reality. I will share that my husband and I are indeed more in love than ever. I will share that modern medicine is amazing and I am forever grateful to the surgeon who listened to me and finally was able to diagnose me with endometriosis.

All those moments and more made up a painful, wondrous, family-filled year. They say that one’s formative years usually happen before age 25, but I argue that all years can be formative, some more than others. I’m thankful I have the maturity and wherewithal to really appreciate the important work that time and openness can do for our souls.

Here’s to a blessed, wonderful, hard 2018. And let’s welcome 2019 with open arms.

 

Approaching homecoming

Shoot, guys. It’s coming up fast. According to my nifty countdown app, we are at 4% left. However, do not be fooled by my technological prowess, friends. I do have a calendar on the wall and I’ve been crossing off days with a Sharpie since I hung it up January 1.

Before we actually went through a deployment, I had all these media-fed ideas of what it would be like. Some of it has come to pass, like the uncertainty of dates, dropped Skype calls, and crazy math to figure out differences in time zones. But some of it won’t be like what you see on TV, or even from homecoming pictures and videos (which, btdubs, make me bawl my eyes out). For us it’ll be different because of the nature of his mission over there. There won’t be a huge ceremony or large formations (thank GOD)… we’re not hiring a photographer… he didn’t wear multi-cam… no skanky dresses (at least not for me!)… I’m not making glittery signs with questionable verbiage about the nature of the first night together. The moment will be more private and mostly ours. I keep thinking I’ll pick him up in the middle of the night, but who knows.

I’ve been in an emotional vacuum for these last couple months as far as the anticipation of homecoming. After you’ve been through long separations like this, you learn to shut off that part of yourself. It’s good, really, because anything else is just a roller coaster, and you save yourself from potential disappointment. But now that we’re getting so close, my emotions are sputtering to life.

For us, and for lots of military couples out there, life will be all different but the same all at once. I can’t just drop my whole life in order to reacclimate my husband to our life stateside. It’s a strange feeling, because I had always pictured being able to just fall off the face of the planet during block leave. But that’s not even an accurate picture of life. Life has been going on despite the distance… actually, lots has been going on since he left in May… daresay the most important parts of the past few years that we’ve lived here. It’s hard when you realize that there are large chunks of your marriage that you haven’t shared with each other. I can barely put in words what it’s like to be married and be “one” and all that, but at the same time not be “one.” It’s a very strange feeling. Like phantom limbs.

In the end part of reintegrating into life together is accepting that the other person has had experiences, good or bad, that have shaped them throughout the separation… experiences that you will never get to go through with them. Another part is for me to realize that I won’t have to do everything on my own anymore. I don’t have to take out the trash all the time, or call customer service, or vacuum (can you tell which “jobs” are his?). And while from the outside it may look like it’s easy to let him do those things again, there’s a defiant and resistant part of me that says, “I can do it myself!”

I like the woman I’ve become throughout this deployment. I’ve become more stable emotionally (we’ll see if that sticks…), I’ve learned to take things to God in prayer right away… I’ve learned to just take most things in stride. I’ll be 28 in April and I feel like I’m better, more of who I’ve wanted to become. If that makes any sense. I feel different this time around; definitely more at peace and less anxious.

I want to be able to be that woman when life is complete again. The problem with love and marriage and relationships is that there are emotions… a lot of them. I’ve been so used to being alone, living alone, that sometimes I just don’t react to things that I normally would have if he were here… there’s no one to immediately react to my reactions (unless I call or text a friend), so then it seems silly to react, ya know? And the dog, well, she just looks at me with her enormous, ridiculously buggy eyes and she just gets it. No explanation needed. But even though there will be someone here with me, the someone, I hope I can still have self-control about certain things.

March is going to be a busy month, and we won’t even be together for half of it. That’s right, not even half. He needs to see our family, and I will still be in the middle of the semester and then traveling to Portland to present my research. April and May will also be busy months.. but I’m hoping that after graduation, things can settle back in to normal life, whatever the eff that is. That is, of course, unless we move. 😉 See? Always on the go. Never a dull moment.

Anyway.. I just needed to get some thoughts out so I can go to sleep in peace. There were far too many voices in my head. And now I’ll get all comfy in my bed with the dog… poor thing doesn’t know what’s coming, and I don’t have the heart to tell her. 😉

Hello, my name is Elizabeth and I’m a control freak.

With winter break behind us, I’ve had some time, weeks even, to ponder things… events, ideas, prayers. So far my year of no resolutions is going great thankyouforasking… and I have to tell you that my one resolution was to make the bed every day. And as of Day 22 of 2014, I’ve succeeded. 😉 It really makes me feel like I have control over the day so early on…

I’ve really been pondering and mulling over this idea of self-control. It’s a fruit of the Spirit, but it never really stood out to me before. I always thought that maybe things like love and patience and goodness were more important or something. But lately I’m beginning to think that self-control is the key to all of them, and it’s the key to a full life that can manifest Jesus’ love on earth.

And really, it’s not self-control. Lord knows I cannot, I repeat can NOT control myself at Orange Leaf with all those delicious flavors of fro-yo, let alone the toppings. It’s a crap shoot, guys. He also knows that sometimes I just can NOT control my tongue on Interstate 10. I mean, seriously. It’s just offensive. So in all truth in a slow process I’ve been letting my self-control become God-control.

Self-control is a good thing to learn how to cultivate, but if you’re anything like me, you learn things the hard way.

Story of my freaking LIFE.

I have spent most of my 27.75 (as of today actually…) years on this earth being anxious, controlling, worried, planning anything and everything, and that’s my own personal version of lack of self-control.

I have spent a good portion of that 27.75 years letting my emotions get the best of me only to feel regret or embarrassment later. I’m like Kristen Bell; “If I’m not between a 3 and 7 on the emotional scale, I’m crying.” Can I get a witness?

I spent a few years of my 27.75 overweight because of my lack of self-control with eating and concurrent lack of exercise.

I’ve spent a different good portion of my 27.75 years saying things that just seemed to roll off my tongue only to be begging for forgiveness later.

There’s no doubt that running has helped considerably with my self-control. It takes patience and determination to train for a race, to get up when that alarm rings so so soooo early, to reject that second (or third) cupcake in favor of being fueled properly.

The Army has also been a fantastic teacher of patience and self-control… and just life and marriage in general. Early on I’d let myself get all worked up about where we would move… looking up maps and races and interstates and houses to rent and jobs.. I bet you’re exhausted just reading that. I was exhausted, wrought with anxiety over many things I had no control of. I couldn’t even control my own actions or emotions and that quickly leads to a downward spiral which for me ends in depression. And that’s a dirty slimy pit. So dirty. And slimy. *gag*

The thing is, I asked to learn this particular fruit of the Spirit (ughhh silly me!), and I learned a few more fruits of the Spirit in tandem with self-control. And boy was I brought through situations where I was taught how to let go. I think for a Christ-follower to have self-control really speaks volumes of his or her sincerity of faith and growth in relationship with Jesus. With self-control you learn to control the following but Lord have mercy not limited to:

your reactions to things (ahem, crazy drivers on I-10 or Army ridiculousness),

your reactions to people (you know, that one person that just reallllllly gets under your skin),

your eating,

your working out,

your interactions with people at work,

your emotions when in a precarious situation (this I’m still working on),

your parenting (I have yet to encounter this),

your Internet usage (heh),

your Bible-reading,

your praying,

your relationship with your spouse (also working on this, I’m sure my husband is thankful).

If I let Jesus deal with these things and guide me throughout my days, that means that I trust Him 100%. When we start taking back control, we stop trusting. I want to trust 100%. Who wants to take their burdens back? I sure don’t. I wouldn’t wish my past anxiety or worry on anyone. ANYONE. I guess what I’m getting at is that all of this is connected as deep heart issues generally are.

Something I’ve been mulling over is that self-control leads to obedience. To be obedient means that you sometimes have to lay aside your plans, your worries, your anxieties, your wants, your desires, in order to pick up your cross and follow down the straight and narrow. It’s hard because we as humans think we gain something by staying in control. My friends, it’s quite the opposite. Believe me. Congratulations, you gain something alright; you gain back your burdens.

But I want to be obedient. I know God knows when I wake and when I lie down.. He knows my past, present, and future.. He knows what lies deep in the abyss of my soul and longs to take those burdens and control freak tendencies. I could easily be tempted to start controlling the next several months (despite the fact that we are in Army limbo [or purgatory??] right now) and apply to jobs, take teacher tests, and generally freak out. *Gulp*

(Aside: My ten-year PCHS Class of ’04 reunion is this year and everyone’s all “Do you want July 19 or August 2?” and I’m all “Hell *ahem* heck if I know what state I’ll even be in then! Must be freaking nice to know where your LIFE is headed in six months!” See?? Prime example.)

But when I am free from my control-freakness (hey, I’m a budding linguist so I can do fun morphological things like that ;)) and cultivate God-control, I can be freed up to be obedient… and that is the life in Christ I long to live. With the beginning of my 29th year of life and 7th year of marriage quickly (oh so quickly) approaching, I knew something needed to change. I should be better by now, less reactive, more proactive. Less anxious, more sure. God-control is the only way.

Half-a-versaries and grad school…. what?!

So much is happening this week! I’m not even in school and I can feel the stress of the holiday season. This weekend we have two parties to attend, one of which we still need to buy for. Next week, things should calm down somewhat. Aaron will be working half-days and we don’t have tutoring for the next two weeks; just conferences and testing. While my paycheck come the first of January will suck, at least I get to enjoy my time off with my husband.

Speaking of whom… December 21 is our 3.5-year anniversary (of our church ceremony. November 16 was the “technical” 3.5 year thing.) I know, it’s almost as lame as celebrating a half birthday. But hey.. we’re that much closer to four years. After December 21 I can now say that “we’ve been married for going on four years”. This is our NINTH Christmas together. Uhhhh. Where the heck did time go?!

Guess what I heard from someone who just got on at one of the districts here? He told me that for many positions there are 300 applicants. 300. Reeedonkulous. Sigh. I’m having a hard time believing that after I shell out upwards of $400 for my tests that Texas wants me to retake that I’ll be the lucky winner of a teaching job here. It also took this fella two years, yes, TWO, to land this job. We’ll be here three, probably four years total, and I’m not willing to sit around and see if I can get a job, only to leave in one or two years.

My next plan of attack is to get accepted to the University of Texas at El Paso to start my Master’s degree in linguistics. There are two specializations I could do: applied linguistics and Hispanic linguistics. According to our ever-reliable Wikipedia, applied linguistics is “interdisciplinary field concerned with real-world language issues”.

Sounds like fluff, huh? Not so much. Examples of class titles within this degree are Psycholinguistics and Reading, Teaching Second Language Composition, Bilingualism, Phonology, Computer-Assisted Language Learning, Pedagogical Issues in English Structure, etc. With this degree I will gain knowledge of teaching ESL and bilingual students. If I go the Hispanic linguistics route, I would probably have enough hours in Spanish to teach at the community college level. I can’t deciiiide!

In my opinion, this is a much more useful degree for me at this juncture than one in education, and more enjoyable. Blech. I think out of all my undergrad classes, education classes were my least favorite, excluding the middle school courses taught by an amazing professor who is now a superintendent. Most of the time we did fluffy group projects that did not prepare us, or at least me, for teaching in the real world. I did learn a lot in my secondary assessment class, where I learned how to write and structure tests. Anyyywayyyy.

My ultimate career goal is to be a professor. (Did I ever tell you that?) I’m not too concerned about being full-time… I just want to be able to teach, and teach what I love: Spanish and language. I love grammar, syntax, phonology. It’s all so interesting and applicable to every language. Another job that would be awesome would be a reading or language specialist in a school. I just can’t pry myself away from linoleum hallways filled with little humans who are ready to skip class learn. Just can’t.

I would like to start classes in the summer, if possible. I’m also going to apply for an assistantship. Being a TA would be a good experience, I think. I’ll at least be eight years older than college freshmen….. :shiftyeyes: I wouldn’t mind tutoring in the writing center, either. I mean, I have a way with words. Not quite sure what that way is besides loquacious, but whatevz. I also would LOVE to take some elementary Arabic classes… not sure if they’re open to grad students though.

Since I graduated from Bradley, I’ve probably applied to three or four grad programs. I was accepted to ISU’s Spanish grad program, but obviously never went. I also considered school counseling. But, this time… I think it’s really gonna happen!

(In case you were wondering, my #1 reason for going back to school is to wear one of those weird robes that has a hood and really really flow-y sleeves at graduation. Just so we clear that up.)

Folks, it’s only a matter of time before I get a brand-spankin’-new planner and UTEP shirt & car decal. Watch out.

Bataan Training: Week 5 :: Sighhh, and other stories.

This week definitely wasn’t glamorous, running or otherwise. Thankful I got in my three runs [3 mile recovery, 5 mile pace @ 11:00, 2 mile interval training]. We opted to do our long run tomorrow morning. Yes, that’s nine miles before the sun even comes up.

It’s been an emotionally stressful week.  Work has been no less than stressful. People, I have tried as I might to have a positive attitude. I’ve dove into Bible verses and listened to worship music… needless to say, my discontent has lit a fire under my little runner’s rear and I plan on doing something about it soon. (Graduate school?? Maybe??)

Since going to the doctor and getting some medication for my migraines, I have found relief. Yesterday at work I felt it coming on so I took a pill and did not have a headache for the rest of the day. We ended up checking out Costco, except not really checking it out because we don’t have a membership. So we walked around one of the four huge malls here and got cheap meals at IHOP for dinner.

I felt so distracted at dinner… I feel distracted in general. I have a really hard time just sitting and relaxing. The Husband can sit and watch episode after episode of Smallville (our fave show) with no problem. I’m either Facebooking, or knitting, or Skyping. I get home later than he does Monday through Thursday, so we usually eat dinner, or even just an egg sandwich, and end up doing our own thing. That means we’re both on our computers… last night, it was for hours.

I found Little Women on TV and was wrapping gifts. After that was done, we were both sitting on our laptops, do absolutely *nothing* until 11:00 pm. Silly, just silly. With the stress of work, the stress of not having quality time together just about did me in. Welcome to life, Elizabeth.

This morning we had every intention of going to church. However, I think we were emotionally spent and I hadn’t felt very well. I haven’t had any palpitations, but I’ve felt some pressure in my chest. Don’t know if it’s heartburn, a figment of my imagination, or something new my heart is doing. Who knows. It’s not accompanied by any other symptoms so I’m not concerned at this point. Believe me, I could work myself into a panic attack.

My dear runner-Army-wife friend Natalie posted this on her blog.. it’s the Running Resolutions from the latest issue of Runner’s World.

1) Race Farther. Considering I ran a marathon last year, I think my goal will be to exceed the number of total miles in 2012. To date, I’ve run 617.42 miles in 2011. I had a tentative goal to run 700-900 miles this year. 2012? Hmmm… h0w about 1000?

2) Try Yoga. I love yoga. There are so many videos on iTunes and YouTube I can still try. If my schedule allows, I’d like to attend more classes at Soto on post.

3) Lose 10 Pounds For Good. Hmm. Well, I’m at 158-160 right now. For my height (5’10”), that’s a healthy weight. I’ve maintained this weight for two years now after my weight loss journey in 2009. The highest I’ve been since November of 2009 is 165. The lowest, 152. I would like to tone up more and build more muscle. As long as I can fit into my dress pants and skinny jeans, I’m good. At 152-155 I was able to fit in more size 8’s that I have, but I almost felt too skinny.

4) Be More Consistent.  Getting up early with The Husband has helped… a TON. I plan on having a pretty consistent race schedule this year, especially since races on post are pretty cheap.

5) Try A Triathlon. Uhhhh. I dunno about this one. There’s a sprint tri on post later in 2012. I need to learn how to swim correctly first.

6) Win A Medal. This would be pretty sweet, but unless the age group is 25-29 instead of 20-29 and I’m having a super-fast day with not many competitors, I don’t know if this will happen. I’m not a fast or slow runner. It’s always a good goal, though.

7) Try Real Trail Running. Ahhhh. I am so doing this when we go home to Illinois for a visit. Forest Park Nature Center has been calling my name and pining for me in the midst of my absence. We need to find some trails around here that we can actually run on. One of our goals is to hike to the top of North Franklin Mountain. That, we can’t run. It’s too rocky.

8) Stop Giving Up. I have gotten over The Great Running Slump of 2011, thank the Lord. If I can run in the desert at 4,000 ft, I can run anywhere! I don’t want to give up on training, on races, on healthy living.

9) Figure Out My Watch. I have the Garmin Forerunner 405 with GPS. I’ve figured out the virtual training partner, but I know there are so many more capabilities. I use the GPS on a regular basis.

10) Give Back to the Sport. I should volunteer. I am always so grateful for the amazing people that take time out of their schedules to hand out water (and probably get splashed!), work the gear check, whatever..

11) Find More Partners. I want to find some running buddies. It’s hard with my schedule. There’s a running group but they have no runs in the Northeast, the part of town where we live. I have my husband, who is a good running partner, and honestly I LOVE running alone. It’s how I got my start.

12) Beat My PR. I totally plan on beating my PR’s. My 5K time is what I like to see go down every time I race… currently my PR is 27:56. I know with some training I can do better than that. My mile time is 8:15, I think. Not quite sure. I run my first half in January so that will be a brand new PR. I won’t beat my marathon PR at Bataan because it’s simply too different of a course. My goal is 5:30-6:00, but that’s the “optimistic” goal. I really just want to finish.

Just enough

Just enough… like $3.46 in your checking account until payday after all bills and expenses are paid… like older cars that run on prayer and get us places… like just enough patience to get through the end of the work day…

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Last night at church we had a celebration called Taste of the Nations, where the small groups in our church each host a booth of a different country. We make food, handouts for prayer requests and info of the country, dress authentically, and learn common phrases in the language. Our small group was in charge of Libya.

I did not know hardly anything except for the location of the country before we started. Now, I know there are 26 different people groups that have never heard the Gospel. I also know that even if the Assemblies of God (our denomination) had a missionary there, we wouldn’t know because it would put that person in a lot of danger. We learned phrases in Arabic and dressed the part. I was very surprised when several people commented on how I really looked like a Libyan. Aaron and I were even asked if we were missionaries!

We encountered a young couple who have been missionaries in Sudan and now will be leading a Live-Dead team to the Comoros Islands. They have worked under Dick Brogden, a well-known missionary to the Muslim world. Aaron has connections with him through Stone Creek Church back in Champaign/Urbana. We chatted with them for several minutes. They gave us their card and a Live-Dead devotional journal.

It’s no secret that Aaron and I want to go into the mission field. It’s been something we’ve talked about since we started dating, and it’s been confirmed by others. Not necessarily that we will go international, but that God will use us as a team to reach the unreached for Christ.

Recently, I’ve lost sight of that vision. Being together with my husband and living life, however mundane at times, has kept me in a whirlwind of comfort. After his stint in the military, it’d be great to settle down, buy our first house, and start a family. I have these “dreams” for my kids.. that they’ll live in the same house their whole lives, go to the same schools and not have to move around. I “dream” that we’ll finally have a solid emergency fund and cars that aren’t fifteen years old. We’ve even talked about moving back to the Chicago area to be closer to family…

But is that God’s dream for our lives, for our children’s lives? It’s a bit unnerving to think that five years down the road we could be raising funds to go to some remote place to share the Gospel with people who are completely unlike us. Time is short, friends. Jesus could come back at any moment and we need to be ready. As much as I would love to be a stay-at-home mom and live my personal American dream for the next 50+ years of my life, there are dying and lost people out there who have to literally travel 150 miles before they even have a chance of meeting a Christian.

That needs to become a reality in my life. Aaron and I need to continue to cultivate a heart for the lost, and pursue further direction on where we should go and what we should do in 4.5 short years. All our “stuff” doesn’t matter. I think so far we’ve done a good job at not getting too attached to material things. (Check out the link for an awesome blog of a friend of ours!) God has always provided enough. Sometimes, it’s just enough. Our needs are met. Sometimes we’re blessed enough to have excess, and we need to learn how to generously give from that abundance.

We follow a pretty strict budget, but something we haven’t been able to do is save, save, save. Between Aaron coming home for leave from Korea, using our tax return to pay off a loan, and moving and using our travel pay to buy a car, we’ve had slim pickings the past few months. We are thankful for the extra things we get to do, and we have started paying extra on debt again. One of the big reasons we started this whole debt-be-gone ball a-rolling is so we can go into missions with zero, I mean zero, debt.

The truth is that God has equipped us with amazing gifts… every day I am reminded that I don’t teach because it’s what I went to school for; I teach because it’s who I am, my calling. Aaron has an incredible gift with technology, computers, and figuring out technical problems. Imagine how God can use those gifts in a country where they don’t allow declared missionaries, but they do allow teachers and IT guys?

I want wisdom. I want direction. I want a pure heart. I can’t have any of these things until I ask the One who gives all of these things freely… and He’ll give just enough for the need, and more.

I am reminded once again of a quote from A. W. Tozer:

“Wisdom, among other things, is the ability to devise perfect ends and to achieve those ends by the most perfect means….All God’s acts are done in perfect wisdom, first for His own glory, and then for the highest good of the greatest number for the longest time. And all His acts are as pure as they are wise, and as good as they are wise and pure. Not only could His acts not be better done: a better way to do them could not be imagined.”

Being a servant

I look at my recent posts and I’m surprised, and not surprised, that I’ve posted about once a week. What is that?! Usually I have a lot more to say.

But as it stands, I’ve been learning a big lesson on how to be a servant. I can thank my current job for that.

I know I’ve been called to my job right now for a reason. I know positive changes are being made. But the only way to gain real respect and trust is to be a servant. I try to compliment “my” teachers (I say “my”, since I’m kind of a boss… or something.) If someone shows frustration, I try to get to the bottom of it and fix the problem.

Pastor Lee’s sermons recently from The Sermon on the Mount really have me thinking about what it’s like to be a servant.

“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.” Matthew 5:9

As a peacemaker, amateur as I may be, I’m supposed to be bringing God’s peace into situations, and living it out in my life. I should not sacrifice integrity for peacemaking, but I think I’m good at not doing that. I’m the kind of person where if I know I’ve wronged someone, or even think I might have wronged someone, I have to make it right otherwise I can’t sleep at night. (I didn’t always used to be like this! Ask my family…)

At work I’ve really been focusing on having a good attitude, not getting stressed over anything, even if it’s big, and being consistent. I think the last thing there is key to gaining respect… being consistent. People can then see my commitment, that I’m all in.

I’m not going to lie to you and tell you I was jumping up and down when I was offered this promotion. In fact, my heart sank. But I know I’m there for a reason, and slowly things are improving. I’m so thankful to have the opportunity to use my God-given gift of teaching… I have been dealing quite a lot with educational issues. I’ve also been able to continue teaching some students. And I can guarantee you that when I have my own classroom again, I won’t be nervous to talk to parents!

On a different note, if you want your faith to be stretched, your soul to be refined, or you want to learn how to be a servant… get married. Aaron and I have been doing very well lately with communication. In the midst of things happening in marriages around us, we are thankful for what we have. Couple that with being apart for two years (five total in our relationship) and you have a strong bond! I get emotional with him, he gets impatient with me, but we work through it and talk it out. Communicating our fears and weaknesses is one of the hardest things to do, I think.

And I don’t mean that when you get married you become that person’s slave. You serve them with your attitude, your listening abilities, your willingness to work through things, your blatant refusal to be selfish. If you want to add in some dishes or laundry, you can do that too. 🙂 In a true relationship of mutual servanthood, it won’t go unnoticed.

It will flood into other areas of your life, too. Before you know it, you’re being a servant to your friends and family… by praying for them, listening to them, offering a shoulder to cry on or a sounding board for venting… it’s pretty cool how it all works out!

I just love the Beatitudes… (and I did not know this but Wikipedia taught me that “Beatitudes” comes from the Latin adjective beatus which means blissful, happy, or fortunate.)

Matthew 5

 3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, 
   for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 
4 Blessed are those who mourn, 
   for they will be comforted. 
5 Blessed are the meek, 
   for they will inherit the earth. 
6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, 
   for they will be filled. 
7 Blessed are the merciful, 
   for they will be shown mercy. 
8 Blessed are the pure in heart, 
   for they will see God. 
9 Blessed are the peacemakers, 
   for they will be called children of God. 
10 Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, 
   for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

11 “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 

12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven,

for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.