I know that when I feel anxious or swimming in thoughts, I need to just write them down. It's amazing the clarity that can be realized when I put my anxious thoughts to rest. Being alone is hard for me. Ironically, I'm an introvert. But I think in today's terms I'd be considered an "extroverted … Continue reading Being alone is difficult
Tag: anxiety
The Problem of Saturday
Even before I was old enough to have a job in the traditional sense, working on the weekends, particularly Saturdays, was a concept I knew well. Many a Saturday morning, I woke up at a decent time (not by my own accord), perused the "to-do list" written by my mother, and with my sisters we … Continue reading The Problem of Saturday
My constant companion(s)
Mental illness is a bitch. She's the shadow behind you when you look in the mirror. She's the one who whispers, "I'll always be with you." And she's not wrong. I had a stark realization that this will forever be with me. I can't shake it. You name it, I've tried everything. Prayer. Medication. Meditation. … Continue reading My constant companion(s)
Spending time with Past, Present, and Future (no, this isn’t my version of A Christmas Carol)
I look at houses online, a lot. Maybe too much. Sometimes I look at houses in my neighborhood, sometimes in my hometown. Sometimes I look at houses in places I've lived before. I pore over lot size and price per square foot and judge the lighting or staging I see. But mostly I imagine what … Continue reading Spending time with Past, Present, and Future (no, this isn’t my version of A Christmas Carol)
Time and space
I'm beginning to think that sleeping in is overrated. Not only is there science to back this up (REM cycles and all that) but I feel so much more at ease in the mornings if I give myself more time to wake up, enjoy coffee, and read a bit. On days like today, I'm promised … Continue reading Time and space
Writer’s block is a bully.
Maybe if I write about writer's block, it'll go away. You know, just like those bullies that called me "four eyes" and "nerd" and "goody two shoes" at school. In a way, writer's block bullies me too. There are many times throughout the day whether I'm in the car, in the shower, on a run, … Continue reading Writer’s block is a bully.
Passion + espresso
I am terrified I won't feel passion for any life decision again. I spent 28 years of my life preparing to house and birth a child. I chose my college major and my profession around my desire to be a mother. When dating I looked for someone who would not only be a great life … Continue reading Passion + espresso
The Mean Girl in the Mirror
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ You're too tall. You'd better feign an interest in sports so people think you're living up to your height. You're too skinny and too tall. Your handwriting sucks. Erase and write your name again. And again. Be careful about showing too much of the silhouette of your body. Men will make noises at you when … Continue reading The Mean Girl in the Mirror
A lighted match
Anytime I think I don't need to go so frequently to the therapist, I'm proven wrong. Every. Single. Time. Sometimes I internally measure my need for therapy by how long it takes me to start crying in a session. I get a cup of tea from the Keurig that's provided in the practice I go … Continue reading A lighted match
Signs
Today I just had a feeling that it was going to be a weird day, a sign. Usually when I experience this, I do in fact have a weird day. I waited for a call for school to be cancelled due to the impending Nor'easter bound for the East Coast. No call came. Some schools … Continue reading Signs
mercies per mile 
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